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Me.

I'm one of God's creation
A plain girl who realise her full potential is barely reached
Babysit, eating, sleeping and dancing is her best leisure ability
Loves her family & friends to bits
No life ahead without them in my life..
Currently 7hrs away from home
Right now loving the life she is leading in Adelaide only because there are so many things she got herself involved in..
And it is not worthless involvements, mind you..


Tuesday, February 09, 2010
Feelings

No idea what I am feeling. I tell myself stay home and yet I am still out in the end.

Nenek is not doing much better. Infact her condition seems to be unstable. Heard her cry out for Him to take her away, let her sufferings end. She is currently bed stricken. Diagnosed with mild Parkinsons and unable to walk normally as she has an extra small bone growing at the back. It is sticking out and hitting on a nerve at the back. She complains and complains and all we can do is watch and say we know. But what can we do? She is so weak and has no desire to help herself too. Once you give up, nothing people say or do can help somehow. And I feel so Helpless and Useless.

Ya Allah, what do we do but pray? How do we help her suffer less. Is it wrong to pray for the inevitable?

I only have 2 weeks left.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Raw Emotion

I get so sad when i hear people talk about their partners so openly. it hurts just thinking about it. what the hell was i thinking?? how do i get out of it? its not gona happen. Argh!

Thursday, November 12, 2009
Heat Wave

Never have I experienced such a long heat wave anywhere in the world. If the temperature is too high, home is where i will be as there is the airconditioner. But here in Adelaide, we got NO aircon. Portable aircon costs 800 for the good ones and the bad ones are not gona work for the room I have. It is seriously ridiculously hot here in Adelaide. Another 39 degrees tomorrow. God help me.

Thursday, October 29, 2009
Nineteen minutes.

Currently reading a book entitled nineteen minutes by Jodi Picoult. Thanks to the little sis, who introduce me to this fine author. I just had to share this wonderful phrase written in this book of hers
"You could patch up whatever was broken, but if you were the one who had fixed it,
you'd always know in your heart where the fault lines lay."
It is so true..Think about it.
In about a months time, I will be on that plane travelling back to Singapore. I wish things can be different. I wish for just one thing and yet I know it can never happen. Or can it?

Thursday, October 22, 2009
Peels of Layers

As it slips away one by one, I feel myself slowly crumbling. Finally opening up to someone who would understand last night made me feel even more vulnerable then ever. I realise that this is not how it should be. It should be bliss and goes hand in hand. But it seems to be only jealousy on one side, it hurts. Maybe it is just me being paranoid but comforts always can work.

Ya Allah, help please..

Thursday, October 15, 2009
Repeatedly

In love so many times over & over again with the same person.
Still hurt at the end of the day.
Oh, what a life.

Thursday, October 08, 2009
M.I.A.

Realised been missing for a tad too long. Have not had much interest in my own life at the moment but of others. Friends got married, friends left to go back to hometown. Makes me wonder sometimes what I am still doing here. On the days, when I call home, I just feel the storng urge to be back there.

Younger bro just entered camp this morning. I wonder what he is going through now. 2 weeks, he will not be entering the gates of paradise we all call home. He will have those standard botak hair and will not be as fair skinned as he normally is. There were 3 of us and now only 1 left at home with the parents. Hahx.. What time do to us all.

Raya has been a blast this year. It was pretty mundane the previous years overseas. Yet this year is all about moving around the entire state. Pictures are all uploaded on FB and I am just so excited to go through it again next year. Ofcourse, I would rather celebrate it back home in Singapore but if time does not permit, what choice do I have right? I m guessing next year, I want my baju raya to be a bright colour! Omg.. I can't wait!

Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Oh crap!

I don't even remember the last time I blogged. Seems eons ago. It's not like my life is boring, well actually pretty much. But seriously, NO! I just do not know how to put it in words and share it. But when I read the other's entries, I get all jiffed up and ready to write. And once I do get into my blogger page, I suddenly get stuck.Again.

2 weeks of the semster left before exam breaks and then Exam and then graduation. I get the feeling that I end my whole school on the 10th of july cause that is what seems to be the murmurs of the peers around me in lectures. After which, I plan to head to all the different australian states just for holidays. I am uber excited!!

I was watching some tv show yesternight and I realise I actually do wana go travel to america and visit especially 3 places; Hollywood, Las Vegas and LA. No idea why but this 3 is a must for when I am in America. I actually dream of meeting oBAMa. No reason just cause I think he actually looks hot. And President and HOT just doesn't correlate. SO to have one, is an opportunity.

I am already turning 22 like soon. So it is true, once you turn 21, life passes by like no body's freaking business.. I wonder what age I will die.

I am in Uni's computer lab and I see every one really concentrating on whatever they are doing. Most of which are assignments and I ask myself, what Am I doing? wasting time updating my blog. Oh that's right, cause I finish with my assignments. Aren't I a good student? Heh... RIIGhhT!!

Wednesday, April 08, 2009
Emotions

Wish you get it.
Maybe one day, if you go through it, you will understand why I make a big fuss of it.
Only then will you understand.

People say experience makes you a beta person.
I say, it makes you expect the worse and brings out the worse in you.

Tuesday, March 03, 2009
Back home again.. Or away again?

So in Adelaide all over again. 25th of February 2009 was when I left terminal 3, Changi Airport at approximately 2355. It was neither rain nor sunshine. The 2 families were there to send us off and the ever frequent sender, the Atan family. Not forgetting, Qhairul was there too. Red eyes after work and yet he still came. Thank you to all of you..

It practically rained the whole day today and I am freezing my 2 feets off. Cannot tahan already lah.. But I must admit, I am loving it. Gloomy weather. Kinda makes my day even though I am not feeling the same..

And yes semester just started. I really need to buck up. It is the last and I have got to study harder than b3fore, before I start wondering what isit do I want to do next. Yikes!! Help...

Missing you already..