Me.
A plain girl who realise her full potential is barely reached
Babysit, eating, sleeping and dancing is her best leisure ability
Loves her family & friends to bits
No life ahead without them in my life..
Currently 7hrs away from home
Right now loving the life she is leading in Adelaide only because there are so many things she got herself involved in..
And it is not worthless involvements, mind you..
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Saturday, July 30, 2005
everytime i look forward to something the Biatch spols my mood
well lets see evrything today was a normal day..i went to school at 11 for my bnt lab. It was oklah..then went to TCC for my SIP briefing..wahlau..the conditions ah very d strict leh..k then i went home cox aparently mak sham tk jadi keluar..ok so then i got a msg from sham at 6+ asking if i was goin out wif his mum n i said "tk, she kol saying she had nothing to buy so we postpone it to a day when she has to buy something ah.asal kepo2?jgn takot, i jakan jage mak u lah" and he didnt reply..k fine...so after maghrib i was to meet dayu, su and farhan to attend the manifestasi at tpjc..it was fun ah!!very farnie..even betta then the one at tjc..haha..and got one kewt dikir guy..*winks* haha..k but b4 dat..something happened wich totally spoilt my mood.
yana, D BIATCH called..yah she called all of a sudden..well she msged at first lah..asking me to go to balamak chat room..is there such a chat room i wonder??*scratching head*but i didnt reply her..why should i??i have NVR replied her msgs aniwaez..so then she called..
when she called i step didnt noe who she was..so i asked sape ni?she said yana ah..i answered oh nak ape?then she asked for my email add..i asked ah uat pe?she said i wana give u sumting..i dun wana talk or msg thats why i need ur email add..i was thinking stupid sak dis girl! isnt it easier to talk on the phone as compared to email ??so i said eh i da tak contact sham ni lagi seme asal maseh kacau i ah? then she sampuk b4 i could finish my sentence, "eh there is something wrong btw me n sham now ok( there always is something wrong btw u 2*eyes rolls*) something to do with d past bab tu i wana give u something" she said something like dat ah...then i still didnt wana give..then she said this.. EH JGN SOMBONG LEH TAK? i was like dumbstruck!!sombong??ape sak sombong??so i answered "sape sombong sak??org da tknk ade kene mengene dgn krg ah why should i give u my email add..then u tell me things n get me hurt all over again??"then she tak puas hati ah she said somethings ah wich i didnt hear properly..but i was so damn pissed off wif her that i told her "eh im outside ah later kol me bck." she said k bye.. i just put the phone down...and ryt she has not called me since..
I bET she is now complaining to sham abt how badly i treated her and all those stuff..for all u noe she might twist d story n say i rude to her all dat..ah go to hell wif u 2..cant see me in peace isit!!??da diam2 tibe2 dtg blik in my life..i mean if u kol and just wana b frens dun ever talk about the past i dun mind ah..ni tak..bobal abt d PAST..and puting d FUCKING blame on me again..fuck u ah..im tired of this...u 2 have fun ah!!
And now my sad part is i found out yusri aka pie suffered from dengue fever!!yes he was admitted to hospital on sunday n just got discharged either wednesday or thursday..so sad i found out form sham..i was shocked..so i msged yusri today. " hey i heard from sham what happened to you.just wana wish u speedy recovery..tk cre ape2 msg" n he didnt reply..not that i expect him to ah he is sick wad..but haix..duno ah i miss him..hee damn!!
yana, D BIATCH called..yah she called all of a sudden..well she msged at first lah..asking me to go to balamak chat room..is there such a chat room i wonder??*scratching head*but i didnt reply her..why should i??i have NVR replied her msgs aniwaez..so then she called..
when she called i step didnt noe who she was..so i asked sape ni?she said yana ah..i answered oh nak ape?then she asked for my email add..i asked ah uat pe?she said i wana give u sumting..i dun wana talk or msg thats why i need ur email add..i was thinking stupid sak dis girl! isnt it easier to talk on the phone as compared to email ??so i said eh i da tak contact sham ni lagi seme asal maseh kacau i ah? then she sampuk b4 i could finish my sentence, "eh there is something wrong btw me n sham now ok( there always is something wrong btw u 2*eyes rolls*) something to do with d past bab tu i wana give u something" she said something like dat ah...then i still didnt wana give..then she said this.. EH JGN SOMBONG LEH TAK? i was like dumbstruck!!sombong??ape sak sombong??so i answered "sape sombong sak??org da tknk ade kene mengene dgn krg ah why should i give u my email add..then u tell me things n get me hurt all over again??"then she tak puas hati ah she said somethings ah wich i didnt hear properly..but i was so damn pissed off wif her that i told her "eh im outside ah later kol me bck." she said k bye.. i just put the phone down...and ryt she has not called me since..
I bET she is now complaining to sham abt how badly i treated her and all those stuff..for all u noe she might twist d story n say i rude to her all dat..ah go to hell wif u 2..cant see me in peace isit!!??da diam2 tibe2 dtg blik in my life..i mean if u kol and just wana b frens dun ever talk about the past i dun mind ah..ni tak..bobal abt d PAST..and puting d FUCKING blame on me again..fuck u ah..im tired of this...u 2 have fun ah!!
And now my sad part is i found out yusri aka pie suffered from dengue fever!!yes he was admitted to hospital on sunday n just got discharged either wednesday or thursday..so sad i found out form sham..i was shocked..so i msged yusri today. " hey i heard from sham what happened to you.just wana wish u speedy recovery..tk cre ape2 msg" n he didnt reply..not that i expect him to ah he is sick wad..but haix..duno ah i miss him..hee damn!!
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
bewildered!!
haaaa huuu heeee!!
guess what!! after 22 days sham actually contacted me back!!yea can u guys believe it?? I was watching my 7 o'clock chinese show as per normal..then ard 7+pm nearing 8pm i heard my message beep..to lazy to actually check who it was from i waited till the chinese show was over..so abit after 8 i checked my hp..n there i got 2 missed kols and a msg..the missed kols were from firah..so i called her back after checking who d message was from..it was an unknown number..and it said " u seems to be close to my mum"..i was like who the hell is this?!? so then i called firah back to ask her what isit she wants..at the time i was talking to firah i got another call but it was a fast one..(d caller wanted to just give a miss call) then i received another msg from that same unknown number.."dolminah masih ingat dolmat??:> haix"
YEA!!its sham!!i had to admit i was surprised BUT happy to hear from him..so then i replied "oh it's u. hi ya wads up?". He said " Notink. how r u?" and we talked for like another 3 sms..
The next day sham actually msged me again.. at 7+am asking if i got msg liyana..i answered " nak msg dia ape seh??i nvr msg her..number pun da takde..aiyo krg dua ni eh tak habis2". then he answered "tkde pape juz askin..Our relationship gonna end..haiz..nvr mind den T'care."then i answered..' ryt, i dun wana say much but i tink later2 u 2 will patch up again..niwae if u wana tok, im here 4 u lyk i said last time..bubye.." he answered "the only think if we broke up theres nO patch up i guess"..and i didnt reply...
then at 2 pm he msged me again asking "Yayah did my mum told u dat im doin a part time job..?" I answered " asal ni? ask ur mum ah" n he replied "i tanya u..just tell me.." but i didnt reply...and now at 915pm i actually got a missed kol from dis num 97473581..i called back it was engaged..so i msged saying " hey i tink u koled me just now but i was a bit bz. Ni sape?" n im waiting for d reply now..:) i'm just scared it might be yana using another person's number or sumting..cox it seems dat sham's and her r'ship is not goin well...i really DO NOT want to be caught up in this mess again...haix..i just take it as it come...
guess what!! after 22 days sham actually contacted me back!!yea can u guys believe it?? I was watching my 7 o'clock chinese show as per normal..then ard 7+pm nearing 8pm i heard my message beep..to lazy to actually check who it was from i waited till the chinese show was over..so abit after 8 i checked my hp..n there i got 2 missed kols and a msg..the missed kols were from firah..so i called her back after checking who d message was from..it was an unknown number..and it said " u seems to be close to my mum"..i was like who the hell is this?!? so then i called firah back to ask her what isit she wants..at the time i was talking to firah i got another call but it was a fast one..(d caller wanted to just give a miss call) then i received another msg from that same unknown number.."dolminah masih ingat dolmat??:> haix"
YEA!!its sham!!i had to admit i was surprised BUT happy to hear from him..so then i replied "oh it's u. hi ya wads up?". He said " Notink. how r u?" and we talked for like another 3 sms..
The next day sham actually msged me again.. at 7+am asking if i got msg liyana..i answered " nak msg dia ape seh??i nvr msg her..number pun da takde..aiyo krg dua ni eh tak habis2". then he answered "tkde pape juz askin..Our relationship gonna end..haiz..nvr mind den T'care."then i answered..' ryt, i dun wana say much but i tink later2 u 2 will patch up again..niwae if u wana tok, im here 4 u lyk i said last time..bubye.." he answered "the only think if we broke up theres nO patch up i guess"..and i didnt reply...
then at 2 pm he msged me again asking "Yayah did my mum told u dat im doin a part time job..?" I answered " asal ni? ask ur mum ah" n he replied "i tanya u..just tell me.." but i didnt reply...and now at 915pm i actually got a missed kol from dis num 97473581..i called back it was engaged..so i msged saying " hey i tink u koled me just now but i was a bit bz. Ni sape?" n im waiting for d reply now..:) i'm just scared it might be yana using another person's number or sumting..cox it seems dat sham's and her r'ship is not goin well...i really DO NOT want to be caught up in this mess again...haix..i just take it as it come...
can u believe it!?! i don't know what is happening to me. i guess what my mum said is true i suppose..she said " yaya, now is not the right time to be having a boifren and thinking about all this, it will affect your studies". haix..i did not do well at all for my term test..I Am So Sad & Disappointed..i wish i could blame SHAM..because of him i could not study for my tests..i kept on thinking of him! BUT why blame him??why blame others??You only have yourself to blame for falling so deep..haix..i will need to really buck up..i cant let my family down, i cant let MYSELF down for that matter...even sham's mum advised me not to be bothered with all this. "tumpukan perhatian kepada pelajaran" thats what she kept on reminding me last tuesday on the phone..yeah i guess i have to move on..all this can wait..i'm young still.haix but its always EZ to say. come on yaya I CAN DO IT!!
mm im wondering why isit every time u LOSE one, u WANT one and yet you GAIN alot more..i'm talking about GUYS...i lost a guy and i want a certain guy and right now i have a few guys who likes me.. mm*thinking*.. Life is so confusing..they play with u!!hehe..But i'll take it slow now..i dun wana rush things since i DO need to concentrate on my studies...my aim is NOt to get my GPA below 3 points..i gotta maintain my standard!!wish me luck..
yay!!8 more days to my big day!! 3rd of august!! those of u reading this entry of mine dun u DARE pretend not to knw yah!!wakakak i want my pressie!!hahahaahahahah tak tau malu eh//kidin2..// then i can apply for my driving lessons..1 will be 18 yippee...:p can't wait..well dats all..
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
mm..shocked but happy to hear from her...
wow..i came home from school and guess who called at around 5+pm? sham's mum..i was having my evening nap when my auntie told me i had a call..i picked up and heard makcik's voice..i was shock!!but happy to hear her voice..duno why..and the first qn she asked was " dayah, sham da tak call dayah lagi eh?" i just kept mum...then i told her yah..n she asked asal??i said reluctantly well..yana tak suke dayah and dia tak kasi sham contact dayah lagi" sham's mum then said "huh?apa sham tu suami dia ke?!?" i just kept quiet..then she told me that she got scold yana before that sape2 sham nk kwn baik yana atau dayah itu hak sham..dayah dgn yana masih sekolah blah3....then she told me not to think too much of this...and untuk tumpukan ke pelajaran..and i agreed with her totally...then we started talking on other stuff...from food to flats to how i was wif school...then she invited me to her house tomorrow ard 7+pm cox sham n his colleagues is coming over selling medical stuff..it seems now sham is working part time in ns helping to sell medical stuffs..mm i duno if i would go cox one its at night..and two i dun think i will be buying anything medical..but i said insyaallah... terima kaseh makcik kerana menjemput...:0) then i think she treats me like an anak sendiri ah cox i told her my parents got thoughts of shifting to bedok reservoir...then she was so happy saying ah bile2!!ambik ah dkat2 umah makcik blk 121 blah...(she even offered me an agent hehe) then bleh makcik ajak dayah keluar...nak ajak anak makcik ni seme kan seme lelaki jadi susah then b4 we put down the phone she told me kalo free call lah makcik..n i said ok.. so yah dat was what happen ah..there are other things too we talked about which i forgot...haix...and today is like 18 days since he called...haix...well what can i say..i give up now...:(
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
him
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y242/dolminah/sham11june05.bmp
this is the Fren, the Bakal Matair, the Bastard, the Jerk. the Confused Guy...whatever ah u guys wana name it...this is HE..heeh....kk dun laugh...:p press on the URL to see him
this is the Fren, the Bakal Matair, the Bastard, the Jerk. the Confused Guy...whatever ah u guys wana name it...this is HE..heeh....kk dun laugh...:p press on the URL to see him
~oh happy day~
arghh!!!hehe...guess what!? I met yusri on sunday 17th of july 05..
Remember i made him a birthday present.Alright it was a week late lah but that is not because i forgot his b'dae more like we didn't have the time to meet..so we set the date to meet last sunday..i went to meet him under his block.he lives very near me; 2 bus stops away so i didn't mind the travel..so this was what happened.
I wore my gray jacket with my 3/4 beige pants and slippers..i let down my hair as it was wet..and i wore contacts with my mp3 hung on my neck i went to his house...
It was at 3pm and i msged him i was on my way..17 came and i boarded and reached at 3.06pm?i walked slowly to his block, saw his window was open.i found a place to seat..and i waited 10 minutes b4 i actually got the courage to call him down..hehe..he picked up saying 'ah' and i just answered 'da da sampai da' and then he answered ' kk jap' hehe there was no hello or whatsoever just those words....*roll eyes*..
k so i was looking around(the surroundings) listening to my mp3..do u noe ard his blk alone there are 2 playgrounds!!how cool is that!!??hehe..k then he made his entrance by stamping his feet...sheesh..okies..so i thought it would be i see him i gave the present and we go our seperate ways BUT instead he sat down!!so i just seat ah..yusri was wearing his black specs and looking like he just woke up from sleep..he was also wearing this white temasek engineering t-shirt with short pants and slipper..i like..haaa so kewt..k so our conversation went like this..
me: baru bangun tidur pe??(and he nods after shaking his head konon like to shake of his sleepiness ah)
me: asik tdo ye!!
him:( smiling) tu ah blik pagi2 bute semalam..
so then i gave him the present and i said look at it and ape2 reaction...hehe
he took it and smiled..first he looked into the paper bag.
him: ape kebende ni?? (i just tsked)
him: i still duno what this is...( again i just tsked)
then he took out the present slowly..first he read the card..then gave a nod..(duno what that means)then he tried to open the present but i scotch taped it at the side so he had difficulty for awhile..when he opened it he saw the cd..
me: can u see what is written? ( he just kept quiet and i asked again)
me: alamak kalo tak nampak then i fail ah..ada nama and ada age.
him: (after scrutinising awhile) ok i see d age..aku cume nampak name kau aje
him: nak uat grafiti kene lah btul2..i see d E ye..
me: kurang ajar, da bagus tu orang uat kan..
him: (smiling widely) maceh2
so b4 i showed him d letters i was looking over his head at no where in particular but somewhere behind him and he was checking the cd and i caught him lookin at me..we made a LONG eye COntaCT!! then i went close to him and showed him d P and the I..
him: oh ape kat dalam ni?
me: songs ( n he looks at me like terperanjat gitu)
then i asked him if he wanted to join me and my friends on the 29th of july to tpjc for manifest..
him: manifest?ape tu?(high pitched voice)
me: like the one u went to tp tu..yang ade dikir drama tarian
him:oh....29th july eh?date ape?
me: date?
him: eh day...
me: friday
him: friday eh??then he thought for like so looonnggg....
me:i tell u what ah by tuesday latest u tell me if u wana go k?
him: ah kk...
then we got up to go home...so i was walking out passing his seat then he ask
him: ni skg nak gi mane ni?
me: balik ah...
him: balik?(by this time i was walking infront of him and i turned back saw him checking me out)
me: ye ah..nanti malam aru keluar..eh pie malam gi ya salam pie..(smiling)
him: yasalam??(then he walk infront of me)
him: ni hujan sejuk ke panas ni?( cox i was wearing a jacket ryt, so he was being sarcastic)
me: sejuk
him: sejuk?aku kat umah kepanasan...
him: ni jalan sini nak balik naik bus eh?
i just nodded...
me: antar ah(since he got a bike)
him: (he looks back) ah?
i laughed then i said bye...and he said bye...and we went our seperate ways... haix...dat was d greatest time ever...just being alone with PIE. i do like him i guess..my only regret was that i made the wrong choice..i chose sham over him...haix...:( heee
Remember i made him a birthday present.Alright it was a week late lah but that is not because i forgot his b'dae more like we didn't have the time to meet..so we set the date to meet last sunday..i went to meet him under his block.he lives very near me; 2 bus stops away so i didn't mind the travel..so this was what happened.
I wore my gray jacket with my 3/4 beige pants and slippers..i let down my hair as it was wet..and i wore contacts with my mp3 hung on my neck i went to his house...
It was at 3pm and i msged him i was on my way..17 came and i boarded and reached at 3.06pm?i walked slowly to his block, saw his window was open.i found a place to seat..and i waited 10 minutes b4 i actually got the courage to call him down..hehe..he picked up saying 'ah' and i just answered 'da da sampai da' and then he answered ' kk jap' hehe there was no hello or whatsoever just those words....*roll eyes*..
k so i was looking around(the surroundings) listening to my mp3..do u noe ard his blk alone there are 2 playgrounds!!how cool is that!!??hehe..k then he made his entrance by stamping his feet...sheesh..okies..so i thought it would be i see him i gave the present and we go our seperate ways BUT instead he sat down!!so i just seat ah..yusri was wearing his black specs and looking like he just woke up from sleep..he was also wearing this white temasek engineering t-shirt with short pants and slipper..i like..haaa so kewt..k so our conversation went like this..
me: baru bangun tidur pe??(and he nods after shaking his head konon like to shake of his sleepiness ah)
me: asik tdo ye!!
him:( smiling) tu ah blik pagi2 bute semalam..
so then i gave him the present and i said look at it and ape2 reaction...hehe
he took it and smiled..first he looked into the paper bag.
him: ape kebende ni?? (i just tsked)
him: i still duno what this is...( again i just tsked)
then he took out the present slowly..first he read the card..then gave a nod..(duno what that means)then he tried to open the present but i scotch taped it at the side so he had difficulty for awhile..when he opened it he saw the cd..
me: can u see what is written? ( he just kept quiet and i asked again)
me: alamak kalo tak nampak then i fail ah..ada nama and ada age.
him: (after scrutinising awhile) ok i see d age..aku cume nampak name kau aje
him: nak uat grafiti kene lah btul2..i see d E ye..
me: kurang ajar, da bagus tu orang uat kan..
him: (smiling widely) maceh2
so b4 i showed him d letters i was looking over his head at no where in particular but somewhere behind him and he was checking the cd and i caught him lookin at me..we made a LONG eye COntaCT!! then i went close to him and showed him d P and the I..
him: oh ape kat dalam ni?
me: songs ( n he looks at me like terperanjat gitu)
then i asked him if he wanted to join me and my friends on the 29th of july to tpjc for manifest..
him: manifest?ape tu?(high pitched voice)
me: like the one u went to tp tu..yang ade dikir drama tarian
him:oh....29th july eh?date ape?
me: date?
him: eh day...
me: friday
him: friday eh??then he thought for like so looonnggg....
me:i tell u what ah by tuesday latest u tell me if u wana go k?
him: ah kk...
then we got up to go home...so i was walking out passing his seat then he ask
him: ni skg nak gi mane ni?
me: balik ah...
him: balik?(by this time i was walking infront of him and i turned back saw him checking me out)
me: ye ah..nanti malam aru keluar..eh pie malam gi ya salam pie..(smiling)
him: yasalam??(then he walk infront of me)
him: ni hujan sejuk ke panas ni?( cox i was wearing a jacket ryt, so he was being sarcastic)
me: sejuk
him: sejuk?aku kat umah kepanasan...
him: ni jalan sini nak balik naik bus eh?
i just nodded...
me: antar ah(since he got a bike)
him: (he looks back) ah?
i laughed then i said bye...and he said bye...and we went our seperate ways... haix...dat was d greatest time ever...just being alone with PIE. i do like him i guess..my only regret was that i made the wrong choice..i chose sham over him...haix...:( heee
Wednesday, July 13, 2005
*smiling with a wide grin on tha face*
whoopee!!guess wad??
PIE aka yusri actually tegur me on msn yesterday!!
i went online at around 10+ and i saw him in already BUT..
i didn't acknowledge him, infact i put my status as busy simply to avoid him
around 11+pm he called me...this was how our conversation was..
pie: woi
me: ape woi2?
me:(he didnt answer)abeh diam?
him:jap
him: lemak eh hari tu..dah 10 lebih pun masih terduduk kat ya salam
me: eh aru 10 lebih seh..masih siang i reached home 1130 lagik ade
him: ish ish ish
me:sal? lerr..im sure u blik later than dat
him:for me its different u see
me:y isit diff?
him: coz i'm older..
(and i gave him a roll-eyed smiley)
me: nilah bdak2 poly dulu--> cox he likes to always say nilah bdak2 DIP skg
him: and the most biggest reason!!YOU ARE A GIRL!
me: ye abg, lain kali i wun do it again k :p
him: he gave me a sarcastic smiley
then we talked about other stuffs...
wakakak he cares??haix...
i really like him..But i duno we just wait n see what happens
Niwae he had the graduation thing to day at tp at 11am
happy graduating!!
**jodoh takan ke mana**
Sunday, July 10, 2005
yippee!!i saw PIE!!! on the 10th of july!!
wow!!mm today sham didn't call me again.. yes i do still wonder but mm i dun really care THAT much anymore...however he still owes me 80 damn bux!!so if he isnt gona pay me back...mm..*thinking*...u betta watch out sham!!
niwae what did i do today??well i woke up at 11+am..had tuition with my 'students' from 12 to 2 under my block...after which i went to idayu's house..and headed straight to changi beach at the ferry terminal side there..i was there with her whole family and we stayed there till about abit after 7 pm? we were making PIE's birthday present!!gosh!!i duno y i actually bother..heee well actually i do ah..i think i m starting to like him?haix..i should have concentrated more on him than that sham..niwae after that we had a 'meeting' well i would call a reunion ah with jerald!!idayu, raihan, farhan, jerald, ME, mie, justin--> we went first to long john silver's and then to yasalam...since MIE has not eaten(he came later)... and guess who i saw at yasalam with his friend!!YUSRI aka pie!!!OMG what are the odds!!heee i was like surprised and happy too...when i saw him i thought he won't tegur ah so i step like look another side when i passed him yet he actuall tegur me!!i then talk ah to him...gosh i was so stupid seh like that...i felt awkward... on top of that i was wearing a stupid baggy t-shirt and track pants...and my hair was like clipped with the big clip u know!!so slack!!arrgghhh damn!!
i started the conversation first...
i said..eh sorang kapa then i saw his friend and quickly added dgn dia?then quickly pointed to his friend...then he was like aku sorang kapa...then i straight away asked eh sham macam ne?he said asal kaypoh?n he smiled...haix...that smile..heee..then i was like mmm well no ah actually d girl still msg me...then he was like look surprise ah then i added pompan tu mcm tk tenteram seh aku masih hidup..then pie look at me wif a creased forehead..!!dammit!!i oso duno what i was talking about heee like i said i was nervous its pIE mind you!!then he asked what she msg??i didn't hear so i went closer to him like real close u noe...then i say ah how should i knw..haix another stupid blunder...then i say oh the gerl eh...duno ah dia ckp dayah did sham give u his new number??then pie ask ape number dia??i said i duno i dun have...then i told pie ko blang sham suorh blang pompan dia jangan msg aku lagi bleh tak..aku tak suka ah...BITCH sak!!then i smiled and he smiled too!!then i walked to my table...which was just behind where he sat then he turned and said eh ko pikir aku ni messenger ko eh??then i said ah no ah u my fren..heee...then i faced my friends and yet he still faced me..then iturned ah n said alamak kalo aku tahu aku jumpa kau hari ini aku dah bawa kasi present kau...then he smiled his big smile ..*cair*ahakx , n i looked at him weirdly then just faced my friends.. then at 10 pm..he was about to leave and i knew ah...but i just pretend like i didn't care and just faced infront..then he was standing up drinking his vanilla coke then putting on his jacket ah..and probably glancing my way too hee..then he passed our table..then he looked back trying to catch my eye and when i looked at him he waved..and i waved and smiled back...then he went to his motor ah...and now he in not online...:( probably too tired...
argghh!!!!god i really like him u noe!!!haix...but how??will it happen??i want it too....:p
niwae what did i do today??well i woke up at 11+am..had tuition with my 'students' from 12 to 2 under my block...after which i went to idayu's house..and headed straight to changi beach at the ferry terminal side there..i was there with her whole family and we stayed there till about abit after 7 pm? we were making PIE's birthday present!!gosh!!i duno y i actually bother..heee well actually i do ah..i think i m starting to like him?haix..i should have concentrated more on him than that sham..niwae after that we had a 'meeting' well i would call a reunion ah with jerald!!idayu, raihan, farhan, jerald, ME, mie, justin--> we went first to long john silver's and then to yasalam...since MIE has not eaten(he came later)... and guess who i saw at yasalam with his friend!!YUSRI aka pie!!!OMG what are the odds!!heee i was like surprised and happy too...when i saw him i thought he won't tegur ah so i step like look another side when i passed him yet he actuall tegur me!!i then talk ah to him...gosh i was so stupid seh like that...i felt awkward... on top of that i was wearing a stupid baggy t-shirt and track pants...and my hair was like clipped with the big clip u know!!so slack!!arrgghhh damn!!
i started the conversation first...
i said..eh sorang kapa then i saw his friend and quickly added dgn dia?then quickly pointed to his friend...then he was like aku sorang kapa...then i straight away asked eh sham macam ne?he said asal kaypoh?n he smiled...haix...that smile..heee..then i was like mmm well no ah actually d girl still msg me...then he was like look surprise ah then i added pompan tu mcm tk tenteram seh aku masih hidup..then pie look at me wif a creased forehead..!!dammit!!i oso duno what i was talking about heee like i said i was nervous its pIE mind you!!then he asked what she msg??i didn't hear so i went closer to him like real close u noe...then i say ah how should i knw..haix another stupid blunder...then i say oh the gerl eh...duno ah dia ckp dayah did sham give u his new number??then pie ask ape number dia??i said i duno i dun have...then i told pie ko blang sham suorh blang pompan dia jangan msg aku lagi bleh tak..aku tak suka ah...BITCH sak!!then i smiled and he smiled too!!then i walked to my table...which was just behind where he sat then he turned and said eh ko pikir aku ni messenger ko eh??then i said ah no ah u my fren..heee...then i faced my friends and yet he still faced me..then iturned ah n said alamak kalo aku tahu aku jumpa kau hari ini aku dah bawa kasi present kau...then he smiled his big smile ..*cair*ahakx , n i looked at him weirdly then just faced my friends.. then at 10 pm..he was about to leave and i knew ah...but i just pretend like i didn't care and just faced infront..then he was standing up drinking his vanilla coke then putting on his jacket ah..and probably glancing my way too hee..then he passed our table..then he looked back trying to catch my eye and when i looked at him he waved..and i waved and smiled back...then he went to his motor ah...and now he in not online...:( probably too tired...
argghh!!!!god i really like him u noe!!!haix...but how??will it happen??i want it too....:p
Friday, July 08, 2005
mm Y y Y
its the end of my term test!!!woohoo!!!i feel sad cox i know i did not do that well for my maths test..i could have done better. i guess i lacked practice..i will have to tell my self to buck up!!
haix...today is already the 6th day he has not called me since sunday...the same day that bitch msged me that confusing msg..however i do not believe whatever her words said..i feel it was just an act of impulse as in she only said it at that time...for all you know they are still together right now..i don't really care that they are together...im just wondering why he did not call me??i don't wana call him cox..mm i oso duno y.. there are people who tells me maybe he never call simply to test me??see if i miss him and will call him?also some said that maybe this was actually a plan by BOTH of them to play someone out and apparently i was the victim??*thinking*??some tell me also that maybe he is tired of his own game?some also tells me just wait...he will call ONE DAY..my instinct however tells me that he wun call anymore maybe the girl threatened him like if you ever call dayah i will leave u!!sheesh...if my instinct is right..then that girl is such a two-face...cox when she called to tell me that they both patched up back AGAIN she said i that me and sham could be friends and she does not mind if we call each other...so why is she stopping sham from calling me then!!??!sheesh...i know somehow it is better that he doesn't call me anymore..atleast both of us can move on..im not asking for much really..im not asking to have him back..that is out of the question already..i know he is not worth it..all i really want is really just an explanation..as to why he suddenly kept quiet??our last conversation was gr8!!there was no fights..we were laughing like 2 crazy friends..so what happened??he did tell me this on 30th june 05 " dayah always remember if one day i don't call or message u anymore, remember that i'll always miss you. sayang you and love you as a friend". haix i hope so 2..i duno why i miss that jerk so much!!arrgghh....
tomorrow i have 3 friends who will be turning a year older---> suhaimi...azilah...and PIE aka yusri... well happy b'dae people...may all ur wishes n dreams come true...insyaallah...
haix...today is already the 6th day he has not called me since sunday...the same day that bitch msged me that confusing msg..however i do not believe whatever her words said..i feel it was just an act of impulse as in she only said it at that time...for all you know they are still together right now..i don't really care that they are together...im just wondering why he did not call me??i don't wana call him cox..mm i oso duno y.. there are people who tells me maybe he never call simply to test me??see if i miss him and will call him?also some said that maybe this was actually a plan by BOTH of them to play someone out and apparently i was the victim??*thinking*??some tell me also that maybe he is tired of his own game?some also tells me just wait...he will call ONE DAY..my instinct however tells me that he wun call anymore maybe the girl threatened him like if you ever call dayah i will leave u!!sheesh...if my instinct is right..then that girl is such a two-face...cox when she called to tell me that they both patched up back AGAIN she said i that me and sham could be friends and she does not mind if we call each other...so why is she stopping sham from calling me then!!??!sheesh...i know somehow it is better that he doesn't call me anymore..atleast both of us can move on..im not asking for much really..im not asking to have him back..that is out of the question already..i know he is not worth it..all i really want is really just an explanation..as to why he suddenly kept quiet??our last conversation was gr8!!there was no fights..we were laughing like 2 crazy friends..so what happened??he did tell me this on 30th june 05 " dayah always remember if one day i don't call or message u anymore, remember that i'll always miss you. sayang you and love you as a friend". haix i hope so 2..i duno why i miss that jerk so much!!arrgghh....
tomorrow i have 3 friends who will be turning a year older---> suhaimi...azilah...and PIE aka yusri... well happy b'dae people...may all ur wishes n dreams come true...insyaallah...
Monday, July 04, 2005
Love ~done by me
What is Love?
Is it hurt? Fights? Sadness?
or Happiness? Care? Concern?
Why do We lOve?
Is it to fill our lonely hearts; companionship?
or for fun? experience? feelings?
What do we Love?
Ourselves? them? You? I? Him? her?
When is the RighT tiMe 2 Love?
5 Years time? Tomorrow? Now?
When you're mArried?
When you're bOred Alone?
So what Is Love; really?
Why do we Bother At all?
---> he has not called for 2 days now since sunday..TODAY is our 3rd month FRIeNdHIp ANNIVERsARY!!latest update...the girl msged me "dayah 4 ur info im not hapi dgn sham skg..td i told him to go back to u coz i cant even forget d past..sorie 2 tell u dis. i knw u both just fwen.."Im wondering wad past is she talking about and what is she trying to do here...mm*thinking*
Saturday, July 02, 2005
My liFe with Sham!
4th of April our first introduction
Bloomed to friendship so close and true
With nothing better to do
We fell in love; me and you!
14 May was when we met
Both of us wondering how the other would react
Dunno how, we actually felt at ease
We didn't need to do much simply to please
Great times we had both you and I
However it was also quite a tiring one
The things we went through together in just a few months
Actually it wouldnt be so complicated if someone just make up his mind
and stick to ONE!
Hurt badly...something i experienced twice
Unfortunately by the same guy I loved
Hate...something I would never think of
What's the point? Love cant be forced.
Yes, the scar is still there
But fate is what i would accept this as
A lesson learnt I will always keep
Never fall for a guy so deep
Friendship is what we have now
We are back to square one
If there is just one thing I would like to ask of you
Ingatku dalam doamu...
a new day
wow what happened today??well i dun quite remember anymore...okay...sham gave me a missed call again at 3am, 5 am, and a long one at 6am..after which he stopped..he then called at 1040am while i was in class so it was a short chat..then he called again at 510pm like that while i was at marina watching "A lot like lOve" so again a short talk...i had 2 miss calls from him from his house as i did not hear my phone ring after which i called him bck at 9pm..we then talked till about 1015pm?then he told me to rest as i sounded tired...and he wanted to eat..then do 'something' duno wad...then sleep...at 1120 he gave me another miss call and another at 1130 then i suppose he is sleeping now..well nyt2 my DEAR fren..oh yah tmr night is the night he will be 'tawnin' wif yana...mm....
well other then what happened btw me and sham i went to watch a movie at marina with my 2 cousins khalid and kak ayu and their 'partners' hee yes u guys must be wondering then why i sibuk2 there?well i duno..but it was fun...i thought i would feel awkward but i was not....cool...they told me we should do it again...and the next time i was suppose to bring my partner and let them see...mmm*thinking* well wait long2 ah eh...heee i have to find one first!!
gosh!!term test in 2 days!!and i have not opened my book!!aarrgghhh!!!help why m i so slack this sem??haix...
dayah outs
well other then what happened btw me and sham i went to watch a movie at marina with my 2 cousins khalid and kak ayu and their 'partners' hee yes u guys must be wondering then why i sibuk2 there?well i duno..but it was fun...i thought i would feel awkward but i was not....cool...they told me we should do it again...and the next time i was suppose to bring my partner and let them see...mmm*thinking* well wait long2 ah eh...heee i have to find one first!!
gosh!!term test in 2 days!!and i have not opened my book!!aarrgghhh!!!help why m i so slack this sem??haix...
dayah outs